Thanks to everyone yesterday for your support! I got emails, phone calls and comments that all helped me just get through the day and keep trucking along. Great tips too! I love Kristen's idea for color coded baskets and will have to think about how I can apply that or something close to it for my munchkins. I also liked Jennifer's idea for the to-do lists (yes, please email them to me), but since I only have one reading kid so far I'll have to adjust that one for a bit too. Also big thanks to Staci who, even without a hubby and children, took time to write me a great email regarding the mounting pile of mountain dew cans in her house and reminded me that it doesn't matter what your circumstances are, there is always something keeping you from picking everything up and staying focused and she made me smile!
After my little pity party yesterday, I decided today that I should just focus on the positive and some tiny, small triumphs! So here's my list of small victories:
1 - My hubby did not read my blog from yesterday (he's about 2 weeks behind) and so when he came home and was helping me pick up and made a random comment about how I needed to teach the kids to bring me their cups from their rooms (they always have a drink next to their beds when going to sleep) I DID NOT YELL AT HIM. I had to bite my tongue, but it wouldn't have really been fair since he didn't know what I was struggling with yesterday. I just told him that I was working on it, it was a daily struggle and they might have learned it from him since I usually pick up at least one drinking glass of his in the mornings left behind on the coffee table or fireplace each evening. He doesn't believe me and told me to take a pic on my phone next time and send it to him. Love his sense of humor and love that I didn't have a picture to take this morning since he listened through our teasing to what I was saying. When he remembers to model good habits for the kids too, it makes it easier for me to teach them during the day.
2 - I did not kill the cat. The thought crossed my mind. She has decided that when coming out to play, she likes to climb behind the electronics and through piles of wires. She killed the power on the main surge protector for our tv and components yesterday 4 times in a row. At the time the kids were trying to watch Return of the Jedi while I was blogging and Scooter was not happy that it had to start over each time. Since I currently cannot find the DVD remote I couldn't pick the chapter where we left off. Later, when the kids were resting and I sat down to watch a recorded premier while I folded laundry, I discovered that since she was killing the power while the DVR was still rebooting, the thing reset itself to default settings and DELETED ALL MY RECORDINGS. We are lucky if we get to sit down for one program in the evenings so the DVR is key for us. It means we can watch something we actually want to see and we can do it without commercials. Getting 45 minutes of tv time with my hubby in the evening is fun for me and losing all the programs almost brought me to tears. The only thing that saved the kitty's life was the fact that it was only 2 nights of premier shows, we had already watched Lone Star and Chase (both destined to be favorites for us) and AT&T offers NCIS and NCIS LA (the two that I wanted to watch during laundry because Scotty doesn't care for) via On Demand. I don't get to watch too much tv during the day, but when I am doing laundry, I really like to sit and watch something that my hubby or kids aren't into. The cat is on notice.
3 - I made some progress in my house yesterday although I am not expecting it to last. I got all the laundry done and put away, clean sheets on all the beds and enough stuff picked up off of the floor that Scott was able to vaccuum ALL the rooms while I bathed munchkins. The end result was that when I stumbled out of bed this morning, I got to walk through the dark house without worrying I was going to kill myself stepping on a toy and I didn't have to start my day by looking around at a house that looked like a tornado hit it. I told the kids that I really want to keep it picked up today and although they are currently agreeing with me emphatically, I know the reality is it will be hard to keep them motivated as the day goes on. Still, one day out of the week for a hazard free zone is kind of good at this point.
4 - Homework wasn't painful last night. When Tyler came home and grumbled about me insisting he do his homework at the kitchen table, I held firm. When he complained about noise and distraction, I sent the little ones to my room to watch Noggin and turned off Dave Ramsey radio in the kitchen. When he kept wandering to the back of the house to watch tv with his brothers while he ate a snack, I brought him back and then planted myself at the table too to encourage him to stay put. I did not yell, plead, whine or berate but I was firm. I helped him think through a math problem and then I put my foot down and insisted he use his dictionary to look up the meanings of his spelling words instead of asking me. He finished his daily homework in less than an hour for a change. Then he sat here and worked on his project that thankfully he had found out wasn't really due until Friday (yesterday was just an in class work day after all that madness). He told me about an upcoming math project and showed me how he had already written the due date on the monthly calendar I had given him. It was only one night and I know I am gonna need a whole lot of patience to have more of these and less of the other kind, but it definitely gave me hope.
4 - The timer really works. With a 4 yr old and almost 3 yr old, the fights over toys in my house are ridiculous. It's not like we don't have a thousand toys to choose from, but they always want the same thing. For a long time, Scooter was brilliant at redirecting Riley so that he could have the 'good' toy, but Riley has caught on. When we're having sharing issues, I started setting a timer on my oven for 3 minutes at a time to keep things fair. It took a while for this to really catch on and I had to physically remove toys from kids clenched fingers a few times, but now the timer is my best friend. When one of the kids wants something the other one has, they don't yell and fight and try to take it away - they come and say 'Mama can you set the timer?' How awesome is that? So, I do - every time. And now they are both pretty good about handing over the toy immediately because they know they are going to get it back in 3 minutes. The only problems I have found with this is when we are outside and I use a timer in my head, Scooter will eventually decide that the timer should be in HIS head and he will tell us when the minutes are up (you can imagine how that works) and there are times that Riley asks me 'did it beep? did it beep? did it beep?' for the entire 3 minutes instead of just waiting and listening.
5 - I got a little help from my kids yesterday. Tyler helped me clean the table, set the table and pick up toys in addition to putting his clean clothes away. Some of his help was an effort to have something to log for his cub scouts, but it's all the same to me - less stuff I have to do. The little ones were less enthusiastic about picking up, but when I started handing them small stacks of clothes to put in their drawers they jumped in and made a game of it. Watching little Riley struggle with keeping all the clothes in his arms while he opened drawers was hysterical. I stayed put though and didn't rush to help. I figure it was more important that he was doing something to help than if the clothes got in the right drawers or if they stayed folded. It took Scooter longer but that's because he really can't stand it if clothes are peeking out of a drawer that won't close. It all has to fit or he is going to stay there working on it until it does. I was just super pleased that they were chipping in a little, even though I know it's not an every day thing right now.
6 - Bedtime was easy for a change. The kids had woken up so early yesterday (probably part of my problem to begin with) and then wouldn't nap at all, much less take a decent rest. This is not the best way for a day to flow around here as they get crankier and nastier when they don't have enough sleep. However, it made bedtime a snap. Riley was out within 2 minutes of crawling into bed. Scooter made a show of not being tired, but when I said he could sit with me for a few minutes on the couch before going back and trying again, he also fell asleep within a minute of sitting still. If I thought I could handle the fallout during the day, I would wake them early every morning and never let them take a nap, but it doesn't work that way. Eventually the lack of sleep makes bedtimes even worse, but when it's a once-in-a-while thing like yesterday, it can lead to a very pleasant evening. Scott and I were blessed with almost 2 hours of 'us' time before hitting the sack ourselves for a change. We were able to have conversations with each other AND watch a new show on tv.
And on top of all these wonderful, little, tiny happy moments - I get to go out for a drink with one of my best buds tonight! Yay! Margaritas! Scott has a 3 day weekend starting tomorrow. Tyler is home with us for the weekend, but has a sleep over/team project work day planned at another kids house on Saturday. And Scooter has a by-week for soccer which means I don't have to run for an hour this weekend. Woohoo! Life is great if you take time to see all the positives and the small victories!
Thanks and God Bless!
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