Sunday was promotion day at church and although Scooter had been very excited that he was finally old enough to go to Kids Town and that his cousin Veronica would be there as a helper - the transition did not go well. He cried. He clung to my leg. He struggled as I handed him over to a very sweet teacher that he had never seen before. When Veronica got there he pretty much planted himself in her lap and refused to acknowledge anything or anyone except for the 2 times she swears he did actually laugh at what was happening on stage. He survived and sat quietly through the second hour with the Children's Ministry director after Veronica left, refusing to color his page. We picked him up and headed home, hoping that next week would be smoother.
Needless to say, this other new experience did not ease my anxiety over the looming first day of school. It made things worse. I was in a panic. I wasn't sure that Mrs. Crump was going to lovingly take my screaming child from my arms and shoo me away with a 'he'll be fine' when she had 18 other scared 5 year olds in her room. She's a great teacher (Tyler's Kindergarten teacher as well) and we love her, but if Scooter was in 'Scooter mode' it was not going to be pretty. Sunday passed in a rushed blur with my occasional 'It's already 4:30?' comments peppered through the chaos of preparation.
The good news was that Scooter was exhausted from his Sunday School experience. Around 5:30 in the afternoon, while I was making dinner, he was trying to fall asleep on the couch. He actually WANTED to nap, but we wouldn't let him. We kept him awake and tried to get him moving, making him a little grumpy until his friends came over to play, but he was playing right into my plans for an early bed time and a good solid (with any luck) 11 hours of sleep before school the next morning. He got riled up again, but I knew he was tired.
And something else helped me with bedtime that night which was coincidental, but I kind of welcomed it with open arms. Scooter had a bunch of bug bites on his legs. Poor little guy, they eat him up like sugar and he itches like crazy for days at a time. We put cortisone cream on them, but that only lasts for a couple of hours and if I don't give him Benadryl before bed he'll get up with itchy skin several times during the night. I could double the dose of Benadryl for Riley and it wouldn't make him drowsy, but Scooter gets sleepy within 15 minutes of a half dose which is what I usually administer for the bites. So even though I felt bad for my munchkin, itching away like that, and I wouldn't have deliberately doped him - I was kind of relieved I was going to have to give him a tad of the 'pink stuff' just before bed.
So my little Scooter-pie was asleep by 8:15 which is still 15 minutes later than my ideal school bedtime for him, but since he was out like a light in time for 10.5 hours of sleep, I was pretty happy. Tyler and Riley followed soon after and I looked at my husband in awe that we actually had more than 30 minutes of time together before we crashed out ourselves. It's been a while since bedtime was that easy or early.
Tyler was grumbly and unhappy when I woke him on Monday, but by the time he got out of the shower he was smiling and ready to get moving on his first day. Scooter woke on his own 5 minutes before I was going to go into his room which I think aided in his excellent mood as well. We had breakfast and packed lunches. We rigorously brushed teeth and then shuffled the still very sleepy Riley into some clothes and then all five of us headed out the door for first day pictures underneath the Pecan tree and school drop off chaos.
Already, I was surprised by Scooter. If he decides that I should take his picture, he is all smiles. However, whenever I try to get him to smile because I am marking an occasion or we are getting portraits made he is traditionally stubborn, sullen and won't even look at the camera half the time. Not Monday. He stood under the tree with his brother and without, smiling and posing. It was a picture I really didn't think I would get - first day of Kindergarten and ready to go! Riley didn't want to leave the house and was pouty so he got his picture taken too.
We drove to Tyler's school, avoided all the parked cars and mile long walks for those parents escorting their kids to their class, got in the very short drop off line and let Tyler go off on his own. With smiles and wishes for luck, he jumped out of the van with his violin in tow (that I was positive he didn't need the first day and is now firmly parked at home until the director informs him it's time to bring it back to school) and brand new, ridiculously expensive backpack. We all watched him walk in, a big 6th grader, to begin his very last year as an elementary school student. Then we drove back towards home and to Scooter's school.
Riley had come alive in the backseat and started telling us we had messed up because Scooter was still in the car. Then when we turned into our neighborhood he informed us that we weren't supposed to go home yet, we needed to take Scooter to school. We parked on a side street and crossed to the school and in front of buses to make our way inside. That's when Riley's pants fell down around his ankles, stalling him right in front of a parked bus. Evidently he was wearing a pair of Scooter's shorts thanks to all the confusion. I quickly yanked them up and turned the waist down a couple times to hold them in place and we made our way inside the school.
Scooter had already met his teacher and his speech therapist and seen the room and some of the school at Meet The Teacher night, thankfully. Scooter's biggest challenge is his need to take so long to warm up to everything and everyone. I took my time with his tour on Friday night and wished we could have spent more time with Mrs. Crump, but we got what we got. Turned out it was enough. Scooter found his name tag and we put his backpack with the others on a table in preparation for his first K-5 lesson 'what to do with backpacks and lunch boxes'. We picked a book to sit by on the color-coded mat and said our goodbyes. Smiles, kisses and see ya later's. I walked out of that room like it was nothing.
And then I burst into tears. Ironically, there was only a little bit of 'Oh my baby is growing up and going to school and everything changes now' in my tears. Most of it was relief and awe at how smoothly it all went. It couldn't have been more perfect or normal and that made me so weepy with gratitude I almost couldn't breathe. Of course, I knew, that was only half the battle. The other half was on the flip side of the day - how would he come home? Would he want to go back?
Riley and I survived our first day on our own without a hitch. Grandpa came over to help me finish laying tile in my kitchen. I always knew Riley was a talker, evidenced most starkly at bedtime when he really doesn't get that he is supposed to be quiet while others are trying to sleep or rather thinks he IS being quiet while he recounts his day, tells us stories and goes over details he wants us to remember over and over again. It was obvious though, almost immediately, that without Scooter to play with and interact with all day, I am going to be the recipient of all Riley's verbosity. Non-stop. Talking. All. Day. Long.
My mom is laughing now, as she reads this. After all, she always said I was born talking. Everyone else who knows me well is probably laughing too. I know I'm a talker, love it more than anything. I guess Riley is just going to take after his momma that way. What is it they say? Paybacks are a . . . cute 3 year old!
Three o'clock came fairly quickly so Riley and I made our way back to school and stood with the other anxious parents in the shade on the lawn outside the K-5 and PreK door. The PreK kids came out first and then there was Mrs. Crump, eying the crowd for parents she recognized first. Scooter was the 5th or 6th kid out the door. I stood beside my neighbor whose son, Noah-Scooter's friend, is in the same class. Noah is on the low end of the Autism spectrum and did 2 years of PPCD and PPCDK at this school. He's a practiced hand and came to his mother with smiles. On the other side of me stood an old friend, Deana, whom I met when her son and Tyler were in Mrs. Crump's Kindergarten class together and we were both pregnant with another boy. Her son Adrian is also in Scooter's class and he came out next. Behind me was another neighbor, the one neighbor with GIRLS. Her daughter Sofia is also in Scooter's class (their birthdays are only 1 day apart, they don't play much together but Scooter said maybe he'll be more used to her now and he will do so more often - she's adorable by the way) and she also came out. And then there was my munchkin. (He's there, getting a word of encouragement from his teacher on the top step.)
He wasn't smiling right away, was kind of quiet, came to me and hid his face in my leg for a moment and then when prompted game me a half smile for the picture. Mrs. Crump mouthed to me over his head 'He had a really good day' and gave me a thumbs up. I was so glad at that moment I had pushed for mainstream for Scooter and that second ARD meeting. She had been there as the General Education rep, just for the second one, so I knew she remembered all I had said about taking the reports with a grain of salt and how yes, he has some social problems, but he is more than ready for the academics, etc. As we made our way to the van and our wait in the heat for Tyler's shuttle bus to arrive, Scooter didn't answer my typical mom questions. 'How was it?' 'Did you have fun?'
He was pretty quiet. For about 45 seconds. Then he started talking and was telling me every single detail of his day. He was a chatterbox! When my friend checked in later to see how the second half of our battle had gone, I told her it was so completely and totally normal that it was downright miraculous. We collected Tyler who had a broken zipper on that stupid backpack already. You know, the one with the outrageous price tag and the lifetime guarantee? Yep, that's the one. Luckily it was something his Grandpa could fix in about 5 seconds so I didn't have to have a heart attack.
Speaking of Grandpa - he was still at my house. We had 2 more rows of tile to lay before we were done so he had taken a break while I did the pick ups. He had also brought a box of cookies from Grandma who thought that's what the boys needed after their first day at school. They were pretty excited. But the best part of the day, or one of the best since there were so many, was that when Scooter came in the door - he whipped around the corner and yelled 'Hi Grandpa!' Seriously. My kid, my Scooter. The one who doesn't greet anyone. Dad said to me - I don't think he's ever done that before. I know he hasn't.
So, it's still an uphill battle. Every morning it's harder to get Scooter out of bed since he isn't used to this schedule. Today he didn't want to go at all, but by the time we got there he was ready to walk in, pick a book and go to his mat with no fuss. Last night's initiation into fall Soccer was not pretty, but it was better than last year. However, he absorbs everything and was the only child yesterday who remembered exactly what to do with his backpack and parent folder, etc. when he came in. I got another thumbs up from the teacher yesterday and Scooter was pretty excited he had a stamp on one hand and a sticker on the other. The sticker was for winning every foot race they had in Gym (since he's one of the shorter kids I thought that was pretty cool) and the stamp was for being the best in class at sitting on the color mat quietly and still, keeping his hands to himself.
I am not breathing a sigh of relief just yet, but some of the tension is easing from my shoulders. He really is going to be okay. He told me yesterday that he now knows all his letters, big and small, because he goes to school and they don't talk about letters, they talk about words. The know-it-all-ness of Kindergarten has begun. I am also more and more encouraged that although we know we have some serious issues to deal with, I think some of the observations made during his Autism evaluation were masked by the Sensory issues we are dealing with day to day. I will most definitely ask for a reevaluation this spring that will involve classroom monitoring instead of parental input and a mom in the room to cling to. In the meantime - he has a 'smell stick' in his pocket and is already finding people to sit next to at lunch who don't bring sandwiches so he doesn't have to use the stick for the bread. Smarty!
Tyler's a bit nervous about the heavy academics he is facing this year, but after last year I am grateful that he will be challenged more. Today is his first full day of rotations and academics and I have a feeling we are going to see some serious homework within a couple days. By next week he will be practicing his violin for real instead of just playing around on it. His biggest observation on the first day was 'There's no recess.' Adding orchestra and band as electives took the place of play time. 'No honey, there's no recess. I hate to tell you this, but I think your days of recess are over.' Growing up sucks some days. The disbelief on his face was priceless. I, however, was pretty pumped about the fact that his school offered a fundraiser 'buyout' so with a hastily made donation I will avoid even having to look at the paperwork for selling stuff. This is good since I have 2 kids doing this stuff now.
There's still a lot to get used to. Scooter is going by 'Scott' at school. It's how he writes his name and what they prefer for testing, etc., but it's weird to me. My hubby took to calling him Scotty a couple months ago and his definite effort made it almost too common and kind of made me crazy at first. Now it's sinking in - this is his name, this is what we named him. I always knew this day would come and that he probably would use Scott or Scotty at school, but he's still Scooter to me and his brothers. I asked him if it was okay if I still called him Scooter and he graciously gave me permission. At soccer they asked me if it was still Scooter and I said YES!
Riley and I are making our way through the days, but it's different. We both enjoyed our new Moms group at the church I used to attend MOPS yesterday, but he was so wiped out afterwards he ate 2 Gogurts and slept 2 hours before school pick up. I grouted some tile. Afternoon schedules are about to spiral out of control, but this week we only had soccer. Next week feeding therapy is supposed to begin for Scooter. I want him to have this therapy and I think he needs it at some point, but I am wavering on my decision to start it right now. It seems like a lot of added stress for him in an already busy schedule and the financial strain of all this therapy is catching up. Someone told me this spring that they had always had to take breaks when it got to be too much for their now 13 year old autistic son and sometimes their wallets. I think that may just be what we need. Even if I have to pay for another evaluation later and this one won't stick, we might just need a break financially and emotionally. Something more to pray about.
Anyway - the year has begun and with any luck the heat will break sometime before Christmas. Last week every weatherman said 'we won't break the 1980 record of 69 days over 100', but they have now dropped that from their speeches as we are forecast over 100 through early next week which will put us at day 58 or something and we haven't hit September yet. The reality is that we could easily have that many more days of 100 here. It isn't out of the question anyway, God help us all. I dreamed this morning that the guy on the news flashed in and announced that Hurricane Irene had switched course and was headed for the gulf coast and we all cheered because it meant rain. How sad is that? Wishing for a hurricane? I guess that's what finally broke the streak in 1980.
Hope all your back to school moments were happy ones and that this year brings joy to all of you!
Thanks and God Bless!
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